On Matters of Salvation

I promised to relate the happenings of camp earlier this week, and as the days have been going by without me getting to it, I thought I should simply set aside the time and just write. This is the product, and I hope it isn't as jumbled and confusing as I feel it may appear.




Perhaps to the outsider, it would have appeared that everything began Wednesday night, after the baptism of a young lady we met at camp. It was rather late at night, and we all gathered around the pool as she was baptized. Afterwards we sang as the campers and staff gathered around to give the new Christian a hug. I was with Hana, and I was feeling rather emotional as I could see the struggle in her. She was close to tears, and as we waited our turn to give McKayla a hug, she was crying. It made me close to tears, because I have known the struggle she has gone through for the past year about being baptized. I could feel her desire to be baptized, yet I could feel her holding back, and it made her cry. As I said, to an outsider, it would appear that everything began that Wednesday night, but I know, as Hana's closest friend, that it had begun ever so much before that. The war had raged in her for a very long time. She knew she should get baptized, and she knew she wanted to, yet she pushed it to the back of her mind, and basically turned her back, because of fear. It was that week that broke her, and made her know she had to, wanted to, and needed to do it, no matter what. I was so proud of her, and so happy.




Anyway, to continue the story, the battle continued to rage in her that night. She wanted to, but she was afraid of what getting baptized would mean. There were various reasons, not all of which I can share, but it made her cry in desperation. There seemed to be no choice but to continue as she had, and not get baptized, yet she despaired of that, and so badly didn't want to go on as before. Emotionally keyed up, I was on my way to the restrooms alone when I met the one lady counselor, Julia, on the walk. I felt a sudden and strange desire to ask her to talk to Hana. I had already asked Hana if she wanted to talk to someone, and she said no, because I'm sure she felt that no one could help, but I told her that Hana had been crying when McKayla was baptized, and that she has been going through a lot, and that she wanted to get baptized, but that there were some things from keeping her back. I was so distressed about Hana being so torn up that I'm afraid I must admit that I started crying a little myself.




After the night devotional, there was another baptism, which was again rather emotional for us both. Knowing that Hana was struggling to make the decision, and just seeing the beauty of youth making the decision to serve Christ made me a little teary. After that, we cried together some behind the bathrooms, then Julia stopped us as we were walking back to our cabins, and she tried to talk to Hana. For a while she wasn't really able to say how she was feeling, but after a while she told Julia that she wanted to get baptized, but that she didn't want dad to baptize her. Julia convinced Hana to go to the mess hall and talk to Uncle Paul about it, and so we talked more about it with Uncle Paul, Aunt Janet and Anastasia. Hana told them she wanted to get baptized, but she didn't want to call dad and ask him about it. Uncle Paul and I convinced her that we should call mom, and talk to her about it. I'm afraid I kind of insisted a little that dad wouldn't say no, but when we called home mom asked dad and he said she's too young, and he wants her to wait. We stayed up very early talking, but finally we decided to sleep and pray on it, and we went to bed. Uncle Paul and the other two camp directors were very wonderful through it all, and I was very blessed and encouraged by how much they really cared about us. They prayed many times with us, and I'm sure they have prayed many times for us. It has greatly built my trust, that there actually are many good people out there, that do care about us and aren't hypocritical.




The next morning we went about our day like normal, although in the morning there were two other baptisms, and in the afternoon Hana and one of the directors and Anastasia got together and talked more, tho I'm not sure exactly what they were talking about. That evening Hana and I called dad and Hana talked to him trying to express her deep desire to get baptized right away, and that she didn't want to wait - that she has been waiting and thinking about it for over a year. He was adamant that he wanted to have her come home first and he wanted to talk to her about stuff. He refused to talk over the phone, and he wouldn't accept that this was something between God and her. It was very difficult because Hana wanted to respect and honor him, yet she felt very strongly that she needed to get baptized right away. The call was disconnected, with no resolution. Uncle Paul suggested that we not tell them about the phone call, but that we pray about it, and Hana and I could talk and pray about it, then Hana give us her decision. It was late that night that Hana decided to get baptized. Around eleven forty-five she was baptized into Christ. It was wonderful. I was so happy, and so emotionally worn out that I couldn't stop crying for at least fifteen minutes.




So... That's the scoop. I hope all I wrote is true... the events and conversations are somewhat muddled now in my mind.